Tom Oatmeal

I know your shoes.  I’ve studied them!  All of them!

And if I walk into the restroom and I see those shoes, don’t be surprised if I reach under the stall, grab your feet and try to pull you off the toilet!  

And I will pull!  I will pant audibly as I drag you out from under there because I am a powerful and determined man!  

And if it turns out that it’s not you, then I’m really sorry about that mister, but you see, I work with this guy who has the same shoes as you!