Tom Oatmeal

The approaching sedan slowed down a bit and when it passed us, a McDonald’s bag flew out of the open window, landing at my feet. 

“Alright!”

My friend Cole stared at me as I wolfed down the contents of the bag, but almost instantly, I realized that something was wrong.

“Ugh…god that’s old,” I said.  “I think I’m gonna be sick.”

I began dry-heaving and Cole shook his head.

“Why the hell would you eat that?”

“I thought it was part of the parade.”

“What parade?”